Our New Normal!

Yesterday marked a week since Mike has been home from the hospital. Our new normal has been an adjustment for both of us. I feel like I’ve been honoring the “sickness & in health” thing for a long time, but even more now. 

Since Mike has been disabled, he has been the primary cook, dish washer, grocery shopper and laundry guy. Now, he needs to focus on managing his pain, resting and getting better. I’m taking on “his” jobs as well as my own. Besides working both of my actual outside jobs. I’m learning and trying to be creative with a renal/diabetic diet. I’m working harder on being more organized, keeping his appointments, dialysis ride schedule, and phone numbers straight. 

 Since starting dialysis, his creatinine had gone from 5.8 to 2.6, 2.6 is the lowest his creatinine has been in years. Last week his Creatinine was back into the high threes. This is concerning because it could mean a few things, that dialysis treatments may not be adequately removing the waste products or toxins. This might mean the dialysis regimen needs to be adjusted. It might mean the damage to his kidneys is too severe to be fully compensated by dialysis. It may be as simple as his kidneys need more time to adjust to dialysis doing their job. 

There are so many factors such as Diabetes and high blood pressure. Both have been pretty well controlled between meds and changes in his diet. But the high Creatinine numbers still concern me. 

His diet is the main thing I can help with but it’s not as simple as it sounds. So far it’s consisted of a Nepro shake for breakfast which is specifically for people on dialysis. It helps with nutritional needs and it’s low in protein and phosphorus. Lunch so far has been whole grain wheat bread with Tuna, small amount of mayo and celery. Suppers have been lean meat such as chicken, pork or fish and a side of vegetables. Sounds simple right? It’s not. For example, we love salad, but he can’t have tomatoes, they contain too much phosphorus. He loves Tuna and other fish but they are also high in phosphorus, so we have to be careful of how much and how often he eats them. Cheese is a good choice for diabetics because it’s low in carbohydrates but again is high is phosphorus, so bad for kidneys. It’s a constant balancing act. When planning a renal diet for a diabetic, I have to constantly watch sodium, phosphorus, and potassium. That is where lean proteins and non starchy vegetables come in. Whole grains are best but only in moderation. No more processed, or convenient foods or processed meats. Bye bye, bacon, sausage & hotdogs. Bye bye, canned veggies, canned soups, fast food, chips, pretzels & crackers. Even fruit has to be watched carefully, he shouldn’t have bananas, tomatoes, potatoes including sweet potatoes, too much potassium, oranges and dairy products such as yogurt, milk and cheese. 

He loves a variety of nuts but all except Macadamia nuts are high in phosphorus and potassium. These can be problematic for anyone with kidney issues and can potentially lead to hyperkalemia (high levels of potassium in the blood) or hyperphosphatemia (too much phosphate in the blood).

We have had so many family and friends offer to help and we have welcomed the help of rides to his appointments. Many want to make meals or give us gift cards to restaurants, however, his diet is so strict, we can’t accept these things. I was gifted a gift card to a restaurant when he was in the hospital and that was more than helpful for me because I was constantly on the road between my jobs and the hospital, so it was convenient to order and pick up on my way home, but with him home, this is no longer an option. People constantly ask what we need and we always answer with “prayer”, we truly mean that. We truly believe prayer has gotten us through this rough season. I suppose a grocery store gift card or a gas card would be helpful, but it’s truly hard to accept gifts like these. Everything is expensive these days and we are not the only people with needs. Both Mike and I have swallowed our pride and have accepted some help but it is so much more comfortable to be a giver rather than a taker. 

I know God wants us to be humble and I know it’s important to let others bless us as we have blessed others… it’s the human pride thing. I also know being prideful is a sin and we are working on that. (All have sinned and fall short of the glory of god~Romans 3:23) 

So as we adjust to the changes in our lives, please understand if we are not as responsive with phone calls or available to have a social life or whatever, It is not that we don’t want to. We appreciate each and every one of you and wish we could be more available. I am realizing that there truly aren’t enough hours in the day to do or get done all we want to. 

Although the 3 days a week of dialysis, and other appointments and of course the day to day of not knowing how he will feel or what his pain level is, we welcome visits. Especially visits when I’m at work and Mike is home alone, it gives him someone to talk to and not feel so closed off to the outside world. Pastor Dave from Danville Baptist Church visited him last week and I could tell how much Mike enjoyed that visit. He Said “Dave is really easy to talk to”. He (we) can certainly use the fellowship of other believers.

Day or night, night or day, we will never refuse visits from our grandchildren. other than text from our oldest grandchildren (which meant so much to him) and FaceTime with the grandchildren who live in Florida, Mike went a whole month while in the hospital without physically seeing any of them. Our son Seth and his kids came for a visit this past Sunday and Grumpy (as our grandkids lovingly refer to Mike) finally got to see, hug and hold Lilly and Elijah. Not only did his spirit get lifted, even his skin color improved. Grandkids truly are the best medicine and a gift from God. 

This blog post has turned into just a bunch of rambling but it’s certainly representative of my brain these days. If you’re still reading this, thank you! I appreciate you sharing in our journey and I hope this finds you and yours doing well.